I still enjoy the occasional cigarette. I know, I know – it’s very bad for you. I still smoke as I’m a contrarian who reacts to their environment so as I’m in the birthplace of the ‘no smoking’ movement I want to stick two fingers up to the anti-snout self-righetous brigade. I also quite enjoy it. I was smoking the other night at a bar – outside of course. 

“I don’t know how you can smoke, have you seen the inside of a smokers lung?” someone said to me.

“I have. And I’ve also seen a shrivelled up liver affected by liver scorrosis bought on by drinking alcohol. Also not a pretty sight. Is that a double rum and coke you’re drinking?” I retorted.

Actually I didn’t say that, I thought of it after but reckoned it would have been a brilliant rebuff. As is normal, my incisive and witty response came a few hours too late. I think there is a specific phrase for that notion – thinking something witty AFTER the moment – in French. Maybe it will come to me later. The point is there are many activities that cause physical damage and ill health. I mean, for starters, living has to be one of the most damaging activities – have you seen how some old people look? 

What about eating? That’s pretty harmful, I’ve seen many people suffering through being overweight – particularly in the United States. And that’s the external problem – what about all the heart disease and other problems eating too much of the wrong – junk – thing can cause?  I think it would be useful if fast food came with health warnings on the package like ‘EATING THIS IS SERIOUSLY BAD FOR YOU” and “EATING THIS CRAP WILL SHORTEN YOUR LIFE” or perhaps, more  succinctly, “JUNK FOOD KILLS”.

And driving cars – that pollutes the planet, contributes to global warming, causes respiritory problems and has been linked to cancers. Stick that up your Hummer. Ask an asthma sufferer who lives near a freeway. Passive smoking? And you don’t even need to live near a freeway, particularly here. When I surf you can look down the coast and inland and see the thick brown smog hanging over the land – we’re all breathing that ALL the time. 

The point is I don’t like how smokers seem to get all the bad press and are constantly victimised. We know it’s bad for us but so are many activities. Don’t criticise our lifestyle choice and we won’t criticise yours.